I want

I want a lot of things right now.
I want a car.
I want an apartment.
I want a friendship to change.
I want a friendship to be done.
I want to move on from this place.
I want to be healed.
I want my poetry to mean something to someone else other than me.
I want to make my father proud.
I want her to say yes.
I want to be able to not care.
I want to be stronger.

But I can't have all of those things. Not yet, at least. Some of it is because of money. Some of it is because of the past. Some because it just isn't time yet.
And it kind of hurts. Sometimes, I just wish I had everything I wanted. I wish all of my dreams came true. I wish. And wish. And wish.
I realized I can wish all I want. I can wish until I'm blue in the face. But it won't change a thing unless I take action to make these things come true. The car and apartment are coming. The friendship may or may not change. I'm hoping it does. The one I want to end probably won't, and it probably shouldn't. As much as it hurts, we're friends for a reason. I'm here in this place for a reason also. I'm learning, growing, becoming better, stronger. She may or may not say yes, and it's alright with me either way. If I didn't care, things wouldn't be as good.
Sometimes the things we want, we don't need. I think if I had everything I wanted, I wouldn't appreciate the truly good things in my life. I wouldn't appreciate the things that I work so hard for. The things that mean more than the world to me, would be a lot more meaningless.
Sometimes we shouldn't want so much. We should appreciate. We should be thankful more often than once a year.
Thanks.
Tyler.