Remember

I've been spending a lot of time thinking about my past.

I've remembered things I wish I hadn't. I remember things that hurt. I remember things that were good. I remember being happy. I remember wishing I was dead. I remember being on the borderline.

I did bad things for good reasons.
I did good things for bad reasons.
I live in an aftermath of past actions.

I remember staying alive just to keep one person alive. I remember not eating so everyone else could.
I remember hiding things as a child. Keeping them from everyone else.
I remember sacrifice and selfishness.
Love and hate.
Sanity and pain.

I kept it all in.
Why let it out?
It kills, you know.
I let it all out.
It kills, you know.

I gave everything for nothing.
Expected everything.

I guess I'm cursed.
The memories swirl.
They stab.
They heal.

I made a friend.
I broke her heart.
I hated with my love.

All in all, saying what's said,
It's real.
The pain.
The love.
The heat.

Memory is a fire, burning what it needs.
It may take your sleep.
Maybe your heart.
But if you don't remember, what's accomplished?